52 The Perils of “You”: Avoiding Second Person in Formal Writing

In formal writing, the use of second person (“you”) can create several problems. While appropriate in casual conversation or when directly addressing the reader, it’s generally best avoided in academic and professional writing. This chapter will explore the reasons why second person is problematic and offer strategies for more effective writing.

Technically False Statements: The Problem of the Universal “You”

One common issue with using “you” is that it often leads to technically false statements. We frequently use “you” in a universal sense, meaning “anyone.” However, in formal writing, precision is paramount. If we intend to refer to anyone, we should say “anyone,” not “you,” especially when we don’t literally mean the reader.

For example, the sentence “You can learn so much history in Washington D.C.” is technically false if the writer is referring to their own experience. The writer learned history, but the reader didn’t (unless they were also there). A more accurate phrasing would be “Anyone can learn so much history in Washington D.C.” or, if referring to a personal experience, “I learned so much history in Washington D.C.”

Using “you” in this way creates similar problems in other contexts. “You can see so much from the top of the Texas Giant” is only true if the reader is on the ride. If the writer is describing their own experience, the sentence becomes inaccurate. “You can see so many fish while scuba diving” is similarly problematic. The reader isn’t necessarily scuba diving just because the writer did.

Separation and Accusation: Alienating the Reader

Beyond technical inaccuracies, the universal “you” can also create an unintended separation between the writer and the audience. Phrases like “You should” or “You shouldn’t” can create a sense of distance or even condescension. It can sound like the writer is placing themselves on a pedestal, offering advice from a position of assumed superiority. This can alienate the reader, making them less receptive to the writer’s message.

Even more problematic is the potential for false accusations. Sentences like “When you have an abortion” or “When you drink and drive” make assumptions about the reader’s experiences that may be entirely untrue. Such accusations, even if unintentional, can be offensive and undermine the writer’s credibility.

Inclusivity and Precision: Alternatives to Second Person

Instead of using second person, opt for first person (“I,” “we”) or third person (“he,” “she,” “it,” “they,” “one,” “anyone”). First person can be appropriate when sharing personal experiences or perspectives. Third person allows for a more general and objective tone, which is often preferred in formal writing. Using “one” or “anyone” is a good substitute for the universal “you,” allowing you to make general statements without making false assumptions about your audience.

Context Matters: Formal vs. Informal Writing

While using “you” is perfectly acceptable in casual conversation, formal writing demands a higher level of precision and inclusivity. The goal is to communicate clearly and effectively, without making false assumptions or alienating the reader. By avoiding second person and choosing more precise alternatives, you can create a more engaging and persuasive piece of writing.

Reading Questions:

1. Remembering: What are two reasons given in the chapter for why using “you” in formal writing can be problematic?
2. Understanding: Explain in your own words why the universal “you” can lead to technically false statements.
3. Application: Rewrite the sentence “You can see so many fish while scuba diving” to avoid using second person, and explain why your revision is more effective for formal writing.
4. Analysis: Why does the chapter suggest that phrases like “You should” or “You shouldn’t” can alienate the reader?
5. Synthesis (Focus on audience and tone): Combine the concepts of “separation/accusation” and “context matters” to explain how using second person in a persuasive essay aimed at a diverse audience could negatively impact the writer’s credibility. Provide a specific example of a sentence using “you” and suggest how it could be revised to be more inclusive and persuasive.
6. Evaluation: Based on the information in the chapter, what conclusions can you draw about the importance of avoiding second person in formal writing and choosing more precise alternatives?